Being a beginner - it’s good for your travel and wellbeing
“Become a beginner again. We lose something wonderful when it becomes more important to us to be the one who knows than to be the one who’s open to the everyday wonders around us.”
I’m not afraid to try something new especially when it has something to do with travel and wellbeing. That doesn’t make me immune to feeling frustrated or even incompetent while learning – in fact it invites it. Said like that, one might question my sanity!
What was the last thing you attempted or thought about attempting as a beginner?
I currently have a short but power-packed list of new things to learn. A number of things have changed in my life and my reaction to change is and always has been to learn something new. At 51, I’m flirting at retirement by not working, my sons have (for the most part) flown the coop, and my husband has officially retired. All the external activities and people that have influenced my day-to-day life have shifted. Here’s what I’m going to focus on now:
My current learning list
Solo travelling
Fly fishing
Speaking Spanish
I am a beginner solo traveller.
I have now travelled solo once - not far from home and not for very long. But I did it! My 4 day long-distance walk on the Vancouver Island Trail was a remarkable introduction to solo travel. I was in my happy place planning and designing the adventure. To help overcome my beginner’s hesitation, I put things into motion so that momentum (more than effort) made it all happen.
Walking on the Vancouver Island Trail.
Having tasted the benefits of going solo, in terms of travel and wellbeing, I continue to formulate plans to “become a solo traveller” by going farther or longer or in different ways. For me, this pursuit is not a one and done thing. The first trip established faith in myself yet I’m still nervous about what comes next as I keep pushing my comfort zone.
I am reading and learning and devising plans. Just recently I connected with a few other like-minded women who share this passion and are eager to promote the idea and practice of solo travel for women. As listed in one of the motivating tips below, sometimes a great way to advance as a beginner is to support and teach other beginners. I’m going to try out this tip and see where it takes me. Interested in solo travel with training wheels? Let me know!
I am a beginner fly fisher.
It took me 29 years of marriage to say yes. My husband is an avid fly fisherman. It’s good to have separate interests as a couple and I was not particularly interested in the sport. But in the last year I started to see fishing together as an opportunity to enjoy nature together and (of course) travel together. I love the outdoors aspect of fishing and was open to trying it out.
Happy on the bank of the Bow River, Calgary.
Ten months in and I’m not going to lie, it’s not a piece of cake. If it was easy, everyone would do it. But even with my frustrating moments, I have been hooked. I love the required meditative focus, the spirit of outdoor adventure, and the challenging technical things in mastering improving my fly fishing. So far my expletives outweigh my celebrations but I am working at reframing the difficulties and channeling my inner Karate Kid to wax on…wax off with “patience young grasshopper!”
One day during an internal temper tantrum, I met two other women who fly fish in this male dominated sport. They shared their stories of being beginners and how they now connect with other women in a Vancouver Island Ladies Fly Fishing Facebook Group. I marveled at how much fun they were having, the community they were a part of, and what it looked like just past the beginner stage. They reminded me that with practice and patience, learning a new skill can result in joy! And the bigger the challenge it seems, the bigger the reward.
I’ve now dipped my toes into fly fishing from a float tube, drift boat fishing, river fishing and most recently beach fishing. Each variation feels almost like starting from square one. My tip, as a woman, is to find ways to learn from other women. I found a book called Positive Fly Fishing written by Marla Blair and her technique analogies resonated more than any other instruction I’ve had. My next steps are to join the FB Group and maybe even find myself a woman fly fishing instructor or retreat. Want to join in?
I am a beginner Spanish speaker.
While I’m a rockstar at decoding written words, my foreign language confidence is pretty low. For example, during a trip to Japan where there was no hope of me reading the language, I tried to respectfully memorize a handful of words to be a polite English speaking traveller. I still blush as I recall a visit to the post office. As I waited in line, I practiced my polite words over and over and over in my head. Konichiwa…. konichiwa… konichiwa. I bought my stamps and noticed that the look I got from the post office workers was kind yet comical. It wasn’t until later that I realized that konichiwa doesn’t mean thank you but hello! What a silly rookie language mistake - buying stamps and constantly saying hello. Cringe!
Understanding a language without actually being able to speak it is a phenomenon known as receptive bilingualism. When actively speaking (versus just knowing words) the brain is faced with a significantly higher cognitive challenge. First, you must think how you would like to respond, then you must craft the specific sentences and phrases in English. Then your brain has to translate those phrases into the new language. After that, your brain must recall the ways in which the words are pronounced and finally speak them. Speaking other languages is a huge accomplishment and is a boost to experiences with travel and wellbeing.
Fear of failure and shame keep many people from speaking a new language but for those who’d like to do more than understand words, the best way is to practice speaking it until confidence develops. With an upcoming trip of which six weeks will be in Spain, I want to have more than a few polite words in my Spanish repertoire and I want to avoid my Japanese post office scenario! I am playing around with Duolingo, Rosetta Stone and have recently been enjoying learning with SpanishPod101. I am embracing being a beginner and estoy practicando.
“You can learn new things at any time in your life if you're willing to be a beginner. If you actually learn to like being a beginner, the whole world opens up to you.”
Travel feels like being a beginner.
Travellers are people who are willing to put themselves out there. If you have travelled you know what it feels like to be a beginner. I bet, like me, you carry some highly embarrassing stories and I hope, like me, you are okay with them. They are like stretch marks because travelling isn’t just the easy and the beautiful, it is also the hard, sweaty, lost, heavy, cranky, sad and disappointing experiences, too.
Elizabeth Gilbert, pretty darn famous for her epic journeys, wrote, “travel is worth any cost or sacrifice. I feel about travel the way a happy new mother feels about her impossible, colicky, restless, newborn baby--I just don't care what it puts me through. Because I adore it.”
Even if you are a seasoned traveller or are returning to familiar places, approaching travel like a beginner - with a beginner’s mindset - has benefits for your travel and wellbeing! When we approach anything with a beginner’s mindset we are more open to learning and discovering new things. It can help sustain an attitude of curiosity which allows us to fully soak in and appreciate an experience.
Motivation tips for beginners
Whether you are learning a new skill at home or heading into a travel adventure, here are some motivating tips.
Ask lots of questions with an attitude of curiosity not inferiority, and with a growth mindset….not there yet!
Recognize and honour every step of the experiential learning cycle introduced by Kolb in the 80’s. The cycle includes stages to: Experience – Reflect – Think – Act. Learning is much more effective (and I would argue faster) when you don’t try to skip stages. Pay attention to all the successes and failures to figure out how you can adjust in the next attempt. For example, be open to changing things up and don’t let rigid expectations keep you a frustrated beginner. It’s okay to change your mind or approach things in a different way. Those decisions are a critical part of the learning process.
Ongoing practice is required to get better and to reap the rewards of learning. Patience young grasshopper!
Practice self-compassion as a beginner. How? Use guided practices developed by self-compassion pioneer Dr. Kristin Neff. “Instead of mercilessly judging and criticizing yourself for various inadequacies or shortcomings, self-compassion means you are kind and understanding when confronted with personal failings – after all, who ever said you were supposed to be perfect?” self-compassion.org
Teaching and modeling for others is a great way to learn yourself. There is no need to be an expert, instead, share your stories and lessons learned with other beginners. Pooling experiences amplifies learning for everyone.
“Travel isn’t always pretty. It isn’t always comfortable. Sometimes it hurts, it even breaks your heart. But that’s okay. The journey changes you; it should change you. It leaves marks on your memory, on your consciousness, on your heart, and on your body. You take something with you. Hopefully, you leave something good behind.”
― Anthony Bourdain, No Reservations: Around the World on an Empty Stomach
